To my girl moms/expectant girl moms out there—what was the reaction when you announced baby’s gender? Mostly positive, I hope! Did you get a few comments that kind of made you think, “Huh. That’s not sitting well with me.” But then you brush it off as playful banter. So far, myself and Ashton have gotten:
· “Uh oh, girls are a handful!”
· “She’s a little drama queen!”
· “You’ll have to lock her up!”
· “She’s already being difficult!” –an ultrasound tech when my daughter was moving and the tech couldn’t get a picture
· “Wait ‘til she starts dating!”
Then there are of course the people who suggest you should try again for a boy—for daughter’s protection, to carry the family name, whatever it may be. And it’s degrading as you're standing there with this beautiful baby girl you spent nine months carrying and are now caring for—you want to say “Yes a boy would be nice someday, but look at this wonderful miracle who is here now! Isn’t she great? Isn’t she enough?”
I am still just six months pregnant, and I’m getting these comments. I want to ask people why they would label my daughter before even physically SEEING her. I have aspirations of my daughter being her own person; independent, smart, driven, playful, and curious. She’ll have her own interests because I’ll raise and encourage her to. Yes, I will also encourage her to embrace her femininity because it’s a beautiful thing to embrace!
So what do we do about this? Well going forward, I am going to try to redirect these comments respectfully.
· “Any newborn is a handful, but we’re studying up on how to be the best parents we can!”
· “Dating won’t be something on her radar for many years, but when she does we’ll instruct and trust her.”
There will still be people who have less than ideal mindsets, but responding to those you interact with may cause them to think twice in the future about saying such things. I’m all about positive change, and I think just our generation alone has come a long way in the gender equality sphere. Keep your chin up, girl moms! You’ll incite very positive change in the raising of your own daughter who will show the world she’s not meant to be boxed in!
I have two little girls, and I HATE when people say “are you going to try for a boy?” I am almost 37 years old, Karen. I had both my girls later in life, and (as heartbreaking as it was) my husband and I decided to stop at two for a number of reasons. And that comment hurts because it was a hard decision to come to.
I also hate “oh, you’ve got your hands full…” my favorite response to this is, “I have two hands, and they’re full…. but that’s why I stopped at two“ 🤷🏼♀️
It’s sad that #GirlMom is less of a thing. It’s cool to be a boy mom, or a girl dad… but I…